I’m Voting for Anna Wazowski for Lake County Recorder of Deeds
By Adam Kaz
I’m voting for Anna Wazowski for Lake County Recorder of Deeds because when I met her at the train station she smiled at me with stunning crooked teeth, and she had cute red boots on, and when I told her my name she repeated it back like she really wanted to remember. I’m voting for Anna Wazowski for Lake County Recorder of Deeds because she didn’t even blink an eye when I told her I’m an “amateur journalist,” or something, and that I-should-probably-take-her-card-does-she-have-a-card?
And I can still hear Anna Wazowki’s adorable Polish accent when she said, “I’m really only running to dissolve the position. Most people don’t know what a recorder of deeds does, and the truth is they don’t do much. What they’re supposed to do is keep a record of everyone who bought or sold a piece of property in the county. People come to city hall, they go to the ROD’s office, and they tell him or her what property they’re dealing with. That’s what used to happen. But what happens now when people walk into the office is the ROD just directs them to a website. There are only five counties in the state that have this position, and we’re one of them. It’s a waste of taxpayer money.” And I thought how amazing it was to see someone doing a thing, Any Thing, and suddenly I wanted Anna Wazowksi to be Lake County Recorder of Deeds more than I’ve ever wanted a politician to be anything. And more than that I wanted to hold her hand on election night and tell her she’s sure to win even if she won’t believe me. And then I want to hug and kiss her inside a lively bar when they announce the results. And then I want to watch her get warm on my couch with a cup of hot chocolate in hand, cross her legs, and tell me all about the complicated red tape she’s dealing with in her new job. She’s not sure if she can do it. Then I want to tell her she’s the smartest person I’ve ever met, and she knew this would be a challenge going in, but she’s got an MBA goddammit (it says on her card), and if anyone can make it through it’s her.
As I wrote my name, phone number, address, and main concern as a citizen of Lake County, I told her, “I like people who have ideas.” But what I really meant was I like her, and I like the way her face lit up when I said the word ideas. I’m voting for Anna Wazowski for Lake County Recorder of Deeds because for the past few days she’s been the only thing on my mind. When I’m at work, when I’m at my computer, when I let myself think about REAL LIFE, for the past few days it’s only been about her. And when I think about REAL LIFE I think about going into a voting booth and seeing her beautiful Polish name on the ballot. And I imagine when I do this I’ll be imagining her face on election night and the way her lounge wear clings to her body when she sits cross legged on the couch with hot chocolate in hand and tells me about all red tape she’s dealing with. And if I can’t get those things, I imagine on the day I go to the voting booth I’ll try to think of the man who will. I hope I’ll think well of him. It’ll be easier in time.
I want you to vote for Anna Wazowski for Lake County Recorder of Deeds because for the past few days I’ve been daring myself to call her, take this amateur journalist shtick one step further. But I haven’t and I won’t. But come election season, whenever that is, if I’m not doing something else, I’ll remember her name and her face and her boots and her MBA and I’ll cast my vote. And it’s your duty as a citizen to do the same.
